Backstage at The Gateway – with theatre manager Sophia Moseley

Simon says stand up. Simon says sit down. Stand up. Did I catch you out? I was pretty good at that game, anticipating what was coming next. Not so anymore, especially when it comes to the live gigs at The Gateway.

Some say stand so they can do their thing, others say sit, and it's not always easy to decide. In my last theatrical place of work, albeit pre-Covid, it was pretty much standing every time, but things are done differently here. I reckon I'm slowly sussing it out.

I've had lots of 'firsts' this past month. My first mince pie of the season, the first winter frost, and my first ladies' night that we hosted for Emma Chudley. I'm a naked butler novice, though, to be fair, I haven't actually seen that many naked butts period, but there is something rather peculiar about trying to have a conversation with a bloke who is wearing nothing but a pinny and bow tie. Or maybe that's just me, unacquainted as I am with such things.

Other firsts included the very lovely Lyme Bay Moonrakers who had their inaugural performance at The Gateway. It was lovely to see Carmel and her fellow sea shanty singers as they took our audience on the virtual high seas. Mind you, with the biblical rainfall we're having, it didn't take much imagination. Don't get me started.

I went to a poetry night at Seaton Library. Another first, and I didn't know what to expect, but it felt just like the open mic nights I used to enjoy over the border in Bridport, even more so when I sat next to a fellow poet from the very same group. The performer, Robert Garnham, said one of the reasons he became a poet, was because of his "crippling fear of success". All said in good poetic humour, though I think I speak for most writers whose only fear is that of constant failure.

Halloween came and went without too much fuss thankfully, and that's pretty much it, Christmas is just around the corner. Did you get many trick or treaters knocking at your door? When did it change from parents saying "never accept sweets from strangers" to "go and knock on every door in the street and ask them to fill your bag with them"?

Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body? Well, you do now. That was the bonus question in our spooky town trail.

What about the Riviera Dogs night? How good was that?! They had the whole place up and dancing. They slowed it down at the end with a couple of smoochy songs. During my clubbing days, the DJ called it the "erection section". I suppose I should thank my lucky stars the DJ at the ladies' night didn't play any.

The next party night is our New Year Eve's party. I promise you can stand up, sit down, smooch or dance like it's 99 tonight, and I promise there will be no naked butlers.